Superman Meets the Quik Bunny (1987)
Writer - Mike Carlin
Layout Art - Carmine Infantino
Finished Art - Dick Giordano
Letterer - John Costanza
Colorist - Liz Berube
Editor - Joey Cavalieri
Exec. Editor - Joe Orlando
Special Thanks - Bob Rozakis
I figure I'd wrap up Superman's Birthday week on a lighter note with this silly tale. Superman Meets the Quik Bunny was a promotional comic by Nestle Food Corporation and DC Comics. Superman is no stranger to these odd giveaway issues... I believe I have a Radio Shack promo where Superman meets the "Whiz Kids" kicking around somewhere in the library.
I happened to come across this issue just today in a cheap-o bins, and thought it would be a fun way to close out the week. It is fun, no doubt... but, is it any good? Let's find out...
The weather has gone haywire in Metropolis. One moment there's sunshine, the next has storms so intense that flash floods break out. Superman expresses concern as he rescues a young boy from a fire escape.
In the nearby Metropolis suburbs, a group of children and one brown rabbit are putting the finishing touches on their totally rad clubhouse... er, qlubhouse. Here we meet the intrepid Quik Qlub, Ronnie, Patty, Miguel, and Maureen. While taking a delicious Nestle Quik break, the foursome (plus the Quik Bunny) try and watch some cartoons. To their dismay, the 'toons have been preempted due to the erratic weather news. They see Superman successfully rescue the young boy from the opening page and worry that Superman won't be able to save the day this time.
The Quik Bunny quickly (er, quikly) calls them out, tells them that their worrying won't do Superman a lick of good... and prods them into actually helping him. They don't feel as though they can help, after all they're "just kids".
"Just Kids??!" The Quik Bunny retorts. These are not your garden variety paste-eating children... These are members of the Quik Qlub... and they each bring something unique to the proceedings.
There is not a single inch of planet Earth that Ronnie has not studied. He knows literally everything about geography. He is also a highly trained engineer who, in his spare time, works on airplanes at Ferris Aircraft.
Patty's school science club often gets called upon by NASA when their wi-fi goes out. It is said that Patty is responsible for the creation of Velcro, sliced bread, and clip-on ties. She may in fact be the New-52 Mr. Terrific's mother and ultimately responsible for the Brother Eye project.
Miguel is the result of a super spy program, sent in by a foreign super power in attempt to gain entrance into the most clandestine intelligence organization in the west... the Quik Qlub. He unfortunately has a debilitating lisp rendering his communication skills somewhat moot.
If the Post-Flashpoint DC Universe needs an Oracle, I now know where they can find one...
Newly inspired, the Qlub members pounce into action. The girls let the gang in on some special equipment they'd rigged for the club... qlub... when they transform the tree house into a helicopter... quik qopter, sorry. Our heroes are now Metropolis bound.
In Metropolis we come to find out who is responsible for the Weather Wackiness... its, get this... the Weather Wizard. After spotting Superman, the Wizard summons a bolt of lightning to hit the Man of Steel. It is left to us (yes, us... me and you) to guide Superman out of the city so that the bolt of lightning will explode in the Atlantic Ocean, rather than in Metropolis. I'm not sure that's how lightning works, but I suppose we can play along. The book says to guide Superman with a pen or pencil... but I'm thinking a finger will work just fine.
Okay... that was a close one, you still with me? Good.
The Quik Qlub observe the weather oddities from their qopter qlubhouse. Turning to their computer for the weather info, the qlub-mates are surprised to find that due to a malfunction... the data is coming out all scrambled. So much for Maureen's hacking skills. We now turn to super spy Miguel to crack the code. Only, Miguel cannot do it alone. Who can Miguel call on for help? Yeah, us again... let's see if we can't help Miguel slack off in his only Quik Qlub duty, shall we?
Well, that was a little tougher, truth be told... but I think we're on to something here. We get barely a moment to bask in our job well done before that jerk Quik Bunny jumps in to hog all the glory. He "breaks the news" that the Weather Wizard's behind all this... Thanks for nothing, rabbit. We would have gotten it sooner or later.
The Qlub spies Superman being bombarded with freezing rain (which we learn is also known as, ice). A block of said ice forms around the Man of Steel, and he begins to fall out of the sky... while the Weather Wizard escapes on a cloud.
Patty's science skills produce a mechanical claw (qlaw?) from the qlub qopter that snatches Superman out of the sky before he hits the ground. Superman thanks the kids, and very politely tells them to buzz off.
Miguel begins to redeem himself by telling Superman he picked up on a verbal cue that the Wizard gave during his escape... He said he would "capitalize", so clearly... he's going to Washington DC. No reach there, right? Superman takes the lad at his word and decides DC's the place. The kids (qids?) decide to give chase just in case Big Blue needs a hand. They decide the quik qopter would be far too slow, so with the push of a button, Patty transforms the qlubhouse into a hot air balloon... which, naturally would travel much more quickly (quikly) than a helicopter...
Due to winds resulting from a nearby tornado, six items have disappeared from the streets... it's up to us to help jog Superman's memory.
Okay, soaked in that scene? Good. Now, without looking back at it, let's list everything that's missing a moment later. We're going with the honor system here...
Turns out the book was just humoring us... Superman did not need our help after all. He quickly rounds up the debris on his own. With this feat complete, Superman spies the Washington Monument about to be toppled by the Weather Wizard.
The Quik Qlub floats into the scene, and Patty has a theory that the Weather Wizard may be hiding in the eye of the tornado... Our eyes turn to Maureen who needs our help reconciling the Wiz' location via her useless computer... let's bail these kids out again...
I'm not sure what we're looking at here... is that a stick man? A totem pole? The abominable snowman from ski-free? The Quik Qlub finds the Weather Wizard nonetheless. Glory-hog, Quik Bunny takes what may prove to be his final gulp of delicious Nestle Quik and dives out of the qlubhouse to enter mortal qombat with our villain. Turns out Nestle Quik is chock full of PED's, as our bunny is moving so fast that it appears that there are hundreds of him. The bunny's distraction causes the tornado to dissipate, and Superman is able to re-affix the Washington Monument to its rightful location. Weather Wizard bails once more on his trusty nimbus, claiming to be Egypt-bound.
Superman delivers the Quik Bunny back to the qlubhouse, and heads off Egypt-way... after once more politely telling the children to buzz off. The Quik Bunny won't leave well enough alone and insists the qlubmates follow the Man of Steel. Clearly a hot air balloon will take far too long to cross the Atlantic... Patty now needs our help for the qlubhouse's next form... the Quik Jet Plane. Let's help the gang connect the dots...
The gang arrives in Egypt and much to their surprise, it is snowing. They decide to land the jet and talk to one of the locals. Miguel's communication skills are once more called upon... and pushed off onto us. This kid's on my last nerve... okay, let's do this...
Okay, looks like we're headed for the pyramid. What're the odds, right? The gang takes flight and heads toward the old pyramid, arriving just in time to witness Superman romantically dancing with a mummy. That might be awkward for some... but not the Qlub.
Fearing he is not the center of attention, the Quik Bunny cuts in and unravels Superman's dance partner. The Man of Steel delivers the Bunny back to the qlubhouse yet again... and again, politely warns the gang that they are putting themselves in danger.
Thinking on his feet, the Wiz waves his wand and melts all of the snow into water... flooding the pyramid and nearly drowning the qlub. While Superman tends to the children, the Wizard spies some hieroglyphics which tell him his next destination. He bobbles the stone pictograph, breaking it. No matter, he knows where he's headed... and since he announces his destination... we do too. Psst... it's China, he's totally going to China.
That doesn't stop our resident geography expert, Ronnie (remember him?) from taking the time to identify some of the countries on that fallen pulverized pictograph. Ronnie takes a cue from... well, everyone else on the team and asks us for help. This is an open-book task, we are in fact allowed to refer to an encyclopedia. As luck would have it, my local supermarket just got in the "M" volume... so I should be good to go.
With these four countries shown, the gang makes special notice that China is missing. Stands to reason... we've got (spoiler alert) England, Italy, France, and India... clearly, China is next in that sequence... right? Okay, no matter... we know we're China-bound... after all the Weather Wizard told us he was headed there just a page ago.
The Qlub, not knowing when they're not wanted... head off to China. Once there they find themselves in the midst of a terrible hail storm. The Quik Jet Plane cannot stay in the air. A quick atlas-check from Ronnie shows they are right above the Yangtze River... it's time for the Quik Qlubhouse's final form... the Quik Boat.
Once order is regained, the gang relies on Miguel to translate some Chinese coming over the radio to see if they can locate Superman. Miguel, for once, does not ask for our assistance. He learns that Superman was spotted by the Great Wall of China. Ronnie, with his head still in his atlas, says he can navigate the ship through the Yangtze and to the Great Wall. He, however, does ask for our assistance... Anyone ever drive a boat?
Whew... nearly bit it there.
Okay, here we are. The Great Wall of China. Superman is not only trying to protect one of the Wonders of the World, he is also trying to protect the inhabitants of the city as well. There's no way he can do both and still stop the Weather Wizard... all appears to be lost, until the Bunny gets his Quik fix.
The Quik goes straight to the Bunny's head and he is suddenly just overflowing with ideas. The gang is going to build a decoy Quik Bunny (out of the Qlub's Qollection of Scrap Metal) to get the attention of the Weather Wizard. When I first turned and saw this page, I excitedly thought they had build some sort of mecha-Quik Bunny... imagine my disappointment.
The Wiz fires off a lightning bolt at the decoy, which reflects back and takes the villain out. Superman snags the Wiz, while Quik Bunny grabs the Weather Wand. The day is saved... and all that's left to do is...
Well, just what in the hell is going on in there...
Oh... whew, just a Nestle Quik drinking contest. I'd like to think that Superman let the Bunny win here. Thanks for the calories, we are out,
Okay... Not a whole lot to "review" here. It's a silly throwaway issue that was far more fun to write about than it was to read. This was an extended Nestle Quik advertisement with Superman as a guest-star... as such, and I hate using this phrase... it is what it is.
The writing is silly and hokey, but that's what one would expect in reading a story wherein Superman meets a cartoon bunny mascot shilling chocolate milk powder... the art is fine. Nothing standing out as phenomenally great or offensively bad.
If I received this book back in 1987, I would have been seven years old, and I probably would have loved it. The story is fun and silly for a kid, and the activity portions ain't all that bad either. Before today I'd never seen or even heard of this book. Coming across it in the bins made me raise my eyebrows, and overall I'm glad I picked it up and gave it a read.
Certainly not a recommendation, but it is one of them fun offbeat oddities that I dig having in the collection.
No ads this time around (besides, ya know... the entire thing) but there were some coloring sheets included... Adults playing with coloring books are a "thing" now, right? Well, enjoy...