Gen¹³ (vol.2) #14 (1996)

Gen¹³ (vol.2) #14 (November, 1996)
"Higher Learning"
Story - Brandon Choi, J. Scott Campbell & Jim Lee
Penciller - Luke Ross
Inker - Sandra Hope
Colors - Joe Chiodo & Martin Jimenez
Computer Colors - WildStorm FX
Assistant Editor - Gigi Barbes
Editor - Sarah Becker
Cover Price: #$2.50

Another pick informed by a twitter exchange with Andrew.  Been a minute since we looked at Gen¹³... so why not?

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Wake up in the morning, feeling shy and lonely, gee they gotta go to school.  It's a new day in La Jolla, California... and it just so happens to be the first day... of school?!  C'mon, teams of superhero kids don't go to school, do they?  Aren't they all just taught at whatever institute they're based out of?  Well, I guess that's not exactly the way it works for our Gen-Actives.  And so, while Caitlin's father Alex Fairchild does his... tai chi, or whatever... the kids all get ready for their big day.

Elsewhere, Burnout has done a rather poor job of shaving himself... having nicked himself several times over.  Unfortunately, Rainmaker saunters by in her unmentionables... which causes our man to, uh... flare up... thereby cauterizing his wounds?  Man, hope that doesn't scar.

Elsewhere again, Roxy does one of those in-room fashion shows, like we see on television.  I've never been a teen-aged girl, so for all I know, these might happen in real life?

We then shift to Lynch's underground bunker... office... monitoring room... place.  He's got a smattering of screens up, including a shot of Bobby's blistery face.  Gotta wonder where else this creep's got cameras posted?!  Also worth noting, that one newscaster from Spawn is on one of the screens.  As he hears of a string of student abductions he checks in with Anna, the robo-maid about breakfast.

Turns out these finicky teen-agers don't really appreciate all the hard work the bot puts into making breakfast... you know how deez kids be.  Grunge would rather have some cold pizza (brah!) and a Diet (?) Coke... Roxy's into fad dieting... Bobby's got his Powerbars... and Sarah's, well, Sarah's just annoying.  Caitlin, however, does eat up... and even goes so far as to thank Anna!

Then... finally, it's off to school.  No sooner do they step out of Anna's van than the cliche "As Seen on TV" school experience begins!

Roxy bumps into a dude and drops her books all over the place.  Then... an artsy gentleman stops to help her pick them up.  Wouldn'tcha know it... he's headed to the same Film Appreciation Class that she is!

Caitlin is targeted by a pair of... uh, is "mean girls" still a saying?  Whatever we're calling them, they are a pair of Sorority girls, who are looking for a new pledge.  Who betta than this six-foot redhead?  Perhaps worth noting, they're from the Kappa Lambda Tau sorority... and I hope those letters don't mean anything.  Considering another "creatively" named house we're going to meet, I can't help but imagine that they do.

Speaking of that other house... Grunge decides to pledge for Delta Iota Kappa.  Yeah, DIK, see what I mean?  He and another dude head inside... where they're threatened with... um, some bad touching?

We slide over to the Campus Kafeehaus (are there even classes today?) where Bobby is called over by a rocker chick.  She calls him "Mr. Weiland"... which, yeah... I guess I can totally see that.  They chat, flirt, the whole shebang.

We head over to the Quad where there's already a demonstration going on.  The kids have organized to put a stop to inhumane treatment of animals by the Biology department.  Of course, Rainmaker is right in the middle of all of this.  Grunge strolls by to lend some "moral support"... which is to say, he stops long enough to razz her a bit.

Finally... a class!  It's Neurology 301... which, I mean for Freshmen, that might be a bit advanced.  Gotta wonder what the pre-reqs were if Grunge is here.  Anyhoo... it's Grunge and Fairchild... and it's here that we learn that ol' Percival has himself some'a that photographic memory.

For something completely different, we pop over to the Isle of Gamorra... where some nogoodniks are trying to track down Alex Fairchild.  They beat up some Rodney Dangerfield looking fool... and leave.

Back at school, the day is winding to a close.  The gang all heads back to where they were set to be picked up in the Anna-Van, and they have a few new additions.  It's also here that the art starts to go a bit "ca-ca"... or is that "cock-eyed".

Some friendly razzing between partners changes into heated debate... which, I'd imagine makes their new pals wonder just what the hell they've gotten themselves into.  Before push turns to shove, however, the Anna-Van arrives to take the Gen-Actives home.

We rejoin the gang at the dinner table... where Anna has decided she's had enough of their crap.  She forces them to eat the meal she's prepared... and since she's a robot, I'm sure she actually could just jam it down their throats.  The "animals are people too" debate heats up again... with all sides actually making cogent points.  Lynch basically tells them that this level of discourse is what becoming educated is all about... they don't have to agree... but all opinions ought to be heard and respected.  Grunge punctuates the sentiment with a belch.

That night, the kids unwind in front of the television set... and it's not long before the razzing begins again.  At least it's friendly this time around.  Lynch tries to break it up by suggesting they all do their homework... to which, Grunge informs the gang that his is done, thanks in no small part to his photographic memory.  Wonk wonk.

We close out with... another student being abducted from the college.  Thought for a moment, it was the Anna-bot... but it turns out they just have the same hairstylist.  She wakes up to find herself strapped to a table... and being approached by some odd Kokopelli looking individual.

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Well... as silly and cliche as this was, I can't say I didn't have fun reading it.

This is like... every TV show "first day of school".  Being a dude whose had a bunch'a "first days of school" himself... I gotta just assume I was missing out, because I never had one like I saw on television.

This issue served as a pretty neat diversion from the usual fighty-fight superhero fare... and allowed us to explore these characters outside of the Gen-Active dynamic.  Of course, it's still kiiinda cliche... Roxy and the Artsy dude... Bobby and the slacker/rocker chick.  Grunge, despite being a goofball actually being a super-secret genius... all sorta contrived deals.  Fun, but contrived.

The art here is... uneven?  There are panels that look as though they could've been J. Scott Campbell... and then others that look like they're straight outta OEL manga.  Who knows, maybe there was a time-crunch toward the end... it wouldn't be out of character for a book of this vintage.  The cover is quite striking, and would likely jump off the shelf atcha... which kinda does leave the inside a bit more disappointing.

Overall... I think there's a lot of fun to have here.  It might be worth your time to check it out.

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Letters Page... kinda?

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857

Danger Girl #1 (1998)

Danger Girl #1 (March, 1998)
"Dangerously Yours"
Pencils/Plot/Creator - J. Scott Campbell
Script/Plot/Creator - Andy Hartnell
Inks - Alex Garner
Computer Coloring - Ben Dimagmaliw, Guy Major & Justin Ponsor
Color Guides - Joe Chiodo & Martin Jimenez
Lettering - Comicraft's Dave Laphear
Editor-in-Chief - Scott Dunbier
Special Thanks - Sandra Hope
Cover Price: $2.95

Whattaya call an imprint of an imprint?  Today we're going to be taking a look at a comic from the Cliffhanger! line of the WildStorm imprint... of Image Comics (shortly before it was owned by DC Comics, natch).  Ay yai yai.

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We open with a bit of a recap from the goings on in Danger Girl #0.  Abbey Chase loses the (elusive) Golden-Skull of Koo-Koo Diego to Donavin Conrad, noted scoundrel, as the Danger Girls are (unbeknownst to her) trying to track her down.  The last issue apparently ended with Abbey driving a Jeep of a cliff.  Hey, a real... ahem, Cliffhanger!  Caught up?  Good.

Our real open features a chubby man called Duncan on a beach talking to a fella by the name of Deuce via a pineapple video-phone thing.  He assures Deuce that everything's cool... and Abbey will be fine... just as we shift scenes to her plummeting off a cliff in that Jeep!

She bails out before it lands with a kersploosh as we see Donavin celebrating his believed-to-be clean getaway with the Golden Skull.  Abbey goes underwater and just happens across a harpoon gun!  She fires it at Donavin's boat and hitches a ride.  Hovering above, the Danger Girls look on and comment on what a mess Abbey has made.

Abbey climbs up onto the boat as Donavin continues to gloat... he's really quite a character.  She socks the creep, as some fellas with Jamaican accents watch on.  They open fire on the boat... fillin' that sucker full of holes.  Abbey is afraid they're about to go under, so Donavin does what any man fearing for his life would do... makes a boob-joke.

Abbey and Donavin fight as the boat takes on water.  Abbey kayos him (and his toupe) with a helluva kick.  Just then a blonde on a rope ladder enters the scene offering our lady a hand... which she accepts, with reservations.  Abbey, this mystery woman, and the Golden Skull fly off as the boat goes over a waterfall... and explodes!

Later, we meet a couple more members of the Danger Girls.  One is a tall brunette in a catsuit, the other is a short-haired red head with glasses and freckles... clearly, the "accessible" or "approachable" member of this troupe.  The pair are arguing over what to watch on television when Abbey and the blonde enter the room.  The manner of dress for these characters is... ya know, gratuitous.  Abbey's clothes are barely even hanging onto her body.

Next we meet Deuce.  He's basically Sean Connery as James Bond.  He details his prior exploits as... well, more or less James Bond.  He had to leave Her Majesty's Secret Service due to the worst thing to ever happen... World Peace.  Well, not really... but at this point there weren't many Communists or Nazis to fight, so he got laid off.

Now we get our proper introduction to Team Danger Girl as Deuce attempts to get Abbey to join up... Former Russian Intelligence Agent Natalia Kassle, Australian bullwhip artist Sydney Savage, Techie (heh) Silicon Valerie... and finally, our Lara Croft/Nathan Drake/Indiana Jones-ish Abbey Chase... well, if she decides to become a "Danger Girl", that is.

Later that night, we get... for lack of a better term, a Danger Girl pajama party.  Valerie is in her jammies, and the other two are in various forms of undress.  Outside, Abbey is chatting with Deuce... expressing reservations about becoming a spy for him.  It doesn't take all that much coercing for her to change her mind... and so, she is given her first mission.  She is to check in on a fella going by the name "The Peach" who is into stealing stuff from museums.  Here we go from PJ party to dress-up, as Abbey changes into the naturally too-small costume of a French waitress.  She heads in to plant a bug (in the form of an olive) at his table, and gets whapped on her fanny for her trouble.

Next... The Peach, well... eats the olive-bug, and murders the man he is dining with.

A shootout commences... which leads to a high-speed chase.  Abbey hops into Sydney's car and they are now in hot pursuit.  Syd is able to hop from their car onto the baddies' truck.  One of the Peach's men hop onto the Danger-1... but gets ejector-seated (and subsequently run over by a truck) pretty quick.  Abbey exits a tunnel and finds herself right in the cross-hairs for a pair of helicopters.

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Well, that was some ridiculous fun, wunnit?

Sure, it's silly... maybe a bit shallow, but damned if I didn't enjoy it.  The concept in and of itself is pure nutty action movie fun.  It embraces the gratuitous nature of both it's high-octane pace and the... ya know, attractiveness of the protagonists.  I appreciate how it walked that line between taking itself seriously and embracing its exaggerated bits.

Before we get into the story... we gotta talk about the art.  J. Scott Campbell is just... an amazing artist.  I can understand if folks have reservations about his style, or his subject matter, but I think most of us can agree that this book looks phenomenal.  Everything here looks great... the pencils, inks, and color.  It really is a beautiful book in an era where too many comics were experimenting with computer colors and glossy paper to worry about making an actual "nice looking" comic book.

I first experienced J. Scott Campbell's art in, of all places, an issue of Nintendo Power.  It was the second issue of my first subscription wayyyy back in 1989 (Issue #6, May/June, 1989 to be exact... I received my Nintendo for Christmas 1988).  In the back of the issue, there was some concept art for a would-be (ultimate) video game called Lockarm... which was drawn by a... (15 year-old!) Jeffrey Scott Campbell!  Pretty crazy, right?  I came across my old trove of Nintendo Power back issues a few years back, and that's when I discovered/realized this.  The internet, however, already seemed to know.  In case you weren't aware, here is that page from the issue:

So yeah, big fan of Campbell's art.  Whether it be here, Gen13, covers for Amazing Spider-Man, or wherever... it's always quite impressive, at least to me.

The story?  Well, it's crazy over-the-top action... and, as I've said a few too many times already, it's a lot of fun.  We don't really get to "meet" the cast just yet, outside of their specialties... besides the unfortunately named "Deuce"... who is pretty much a semi-retired 007.  I'm not much of an action-movie kinda guy... or any movie, for that matter... I can't sit still long enough for any of that... so, I couldn't say if any scenes here are cribbing from famous flicks... I'll bet there was some inspiration taken though.  Not a bad thing... or even a good thing.  I suppose if you pick up on it, it's great... and if you/I don't, it doesn't really matter.

Overall, this is a neat little read... doesn't require all that much thought (and that's not meant as a slight in any way... we all need a bit of "mindless" entertainment every now and again)... the art is absolutely gorgeous... definitely worth snagging if you find it at a decent price.  Issue #1 is available to purchase digitally at Comixology.  If you're on the fence, Danger Girl #0 is also available digitally... and is completely FREE.  I'd say it's definitely worth a few minutes of your time.

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Gen¹³ (vol.2) #13C (1996)

Gen¹³ (vol.2) #13C (Early November, 1996)

Story - Brandon Choi, J. Scott Campbell & Jim Lee
Pencils - J. Scott Campbell
Inks - Alex Garner with Richard Friend, Tom McWeeny & Edwin Rosell
Ink Assist - Peter Guzman
Colors - Joe Chiodo with Martin Jimenez
Letters & Computer Colors - WildStorm FX
Assistant Editor - Gigi Barbes
Editor - Sarah Becker
Cover Price: $1.30

Well, we kinda have to do this one now, don't we?  Hey, is that Shi in the corner box?

One thing before we continue into the usually faffin' about... Looking at the indicia here... I'd forgotten that Image era speculation brought about having to put FIRST PRINTING right there just after the comics' title.  Oof... sadly, these days the second and third printings are far more valuable for reasons of availability.

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We pick up shortly after we left off last issue with Grunge, Madman, and Tink traveling along the cleverly named Route 666.  They hear a bit of a ruckus, and the cameos already begin.  The trio come across Maxx and Jungle Princess (who I wanna say is Rainmaker)... just as they're about to be attacked by the Bad Girls Archie warned us about!  They are Lady Death Mortem, Angela from Spawn Guardians of the Galaxy... and I wanna say Zealot from WildC.A.T.S.  Grunge does not appear to be terribly bothered when Lady Death mounts him, even though she's planning on running him through with her blade!

Luckily before Lady Mortdeath can start slicing, Shi blocks her blade!  Well, how did Shi get here?  I'm glad you asked... it looks as though she was driven there by Katchoo and Francine from Strangers in Paradise!  The hell is going on here!?

Lady Death has some words with Shi, but decides that on this day perhaps discretion would be the better part of valor... and so, she and the Bad Girls flee.  We get a brief bit between Jungle Princess/Rainmaker and Tinker Fall, in which we get to see a bit of Roxy's homophobic nature and Rainmaker's lack of subtlety... I guess even in the land of S.A. she's uncomfortable around the ladies.  Anyhoo, Katchoo gives Grunge and Madman their Cadillac (which the Wizard lent to them) in order to head out to the frontier... where they run into Hellboy!  And, er, Monkeyman and O'Brien... who I don't know all that well.

Here we learn that the only solution to the problem of the Frenzy Beast lies with Grunge's Chromium Cover.  No sooner do we find this out than the Beast shows his ugly mug... in his right hand he holds... the Wizard... who, I really don't recognize... not sure if he's supposed to be someone important or not.  I'm guessing so, but I haven't the foggiest.  Anyhoo, the Frenzy Beast wants the Chromium Cover, and promises to fulfill Grunge's hearts desire should he hand it over.

Suddenly zombies start pulling themselves out of the ground (one of whom is wearing a Spider-Man t-shirt... I wonder if the artist got their fair cut of the merch sales!  The zombies quickly overtake the good guys, leaving it all in Grunge's hands.  Suddenly, when all hope appears to be gone, the Good Witch (who appears to be Fairchild in a Disney Princess get-up) arrives on the scene with some words of encouragement.

... and motivational speaker, Tony Robbins?  Are you friggin' kidding me???  This sounds like I'm making it up, I'm sure... but, for real... it's Tony freaking Robbins... and he's here to motivate Grunge.  Ay yai yai...

Starting to think this is MY fever dream!

Oooookay... tough talk from Tony inspires Grunge to get in there and TCB.  He recalls the trinket I neglected to mention that Jim Lee gave him last issue... it's a glowing "X" donchaknow... and from it springs... well, just look...

With BONE CLAWS!  Continuity lives in Grunge's fever dream!

Grunge approaches the Frenzy Beast... who now has his face!  He holds up the Chromium Cover and demands he free his friends... otherwise he'll destroy the comic book!  When the Beast calls his bluff, Grunge starts a'tearing!

Next thing we know, Grunge begins to wake up... in the real world.  He struggles to his feet, and suddenly the ginger nerd from a couple issues back runs in claiming that some creeper stole his Chromium Captain Pyro.  Grunge realizes that the creeper in question is the one he so willingly offered up his mortal soul to... and figures, ehhh... he doesn't really need the book after all.  He hands it over to the dweeb, which makes Roxy super proud.

We wrap up our issue... and this incredibly strange-slash-fun-slash-insane story with Grunge and Roxy finally locking lips.

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...

What... the...?  Tony Robbins?  Gleaming teeth and all?  I didn't just dream this, did I?  I'm afraid to even post this one... lest folks in white coats carrying nets come knocking at my door.  I mean, I've read some weird comics before... but, I'm not even sure how to describe what we've just seen.

At least it was all a dream in the comic, right?  This is a pretty neat telling of a fever-dream for the comics' (and late-night infomercial?) obsessed Grunge... and I had a helluva good time reading it.  Definitely not something I wanna see happen more often, but every once in awhile?  Yeah, this was great fun.  A celebration of who was who in the comics world during those halcyon post-crash days of 1996.

Really not much more to say... the story was insane, but fun.  The cameos were incredible... and the art was really quite good.  Seeing J. Scott Campbell cover all of these characters over the past three issues has been an absolute treat.  I never would have guessed he was such a versatile artist.  I know he has a style... and it's one I think is phenomenal... but to see him cut loose on the Archie characters... Hellboy... even Katchoo from Strangers in Paradise... the man is one hell of a talent.  And, as with most of WildStorm's offerings... the coloring is fantastic!

Overall... ya know... when I started on our visit to the world of WildStorm, I wasn't planning on giving this a solid recommendation... more of a "you may dig this".  After reading all three, I gotta say... if you're a fan of 90's comics, this strange trilogy belongs in your comics library.  Worth a read and definitely worth owning, just for the novelty and trippiness of the thing.

I personally really enjoyed our little detour into the WildStorm universe... and think I can safely say we'll have more on the horizon.  DC's pulling the concept out of the mothballs in 2017... and hell, if it's good enough for them... it's good enough for me.

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(Ya call that a) Letters Page:

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