We're back to the "grind" - and we're talking that one issue of Phoenix Song: Echo we X-Lapsed folk were all quite excited for! I mean, just look at all that Krakoan Goodness on the cover!
Well... about that? Ehh, we'll talk about it. In any event, I'm having a pretty okay time with this one... despite the lack of X-Stuff.
In addition to chatting up this ish, we're also going to deep-dive on All Thing X in Marvel Free Previews for March, 2022! I tried to keep my snark in check... you tell me if I succeeded!
X-Men: The Seeds of Tomorrow Hickman's X-Men Revealed ~or~ House of X/Powers of X Free Preview #1 (September, 2019) Writer - Jonathan Hickman Art - Pepe Larraz, R.B. Silva, Mark Brooks Colors - Marte Gracia Letters - VC's Clayton Cowles Edits - Jordan D. White, C.B. Cebulski Cover Price: FREE On-Shelves: July 17, 2019
Celebrating THREE-HUNDRED Episodes of X-Lapsed... and SIX-YEARS of DAILY content at Chris is on Infinite Earths, by taking a look into the past -- to the very seeds of the era I've dedicated thousands of hours to over the past couple of years - the 2019 House of X/Powers of X Free Preview!
In addition to our hindsight-fueled look at "What's to Come" in the X-Men Universe, I also chat a bit about how we got to where we are... and do a full-on "State of the Union" chatting up all of the books we've covered to this point.
Plus: Great Mailbag and a Stuffed Voice Mailbox! It's near two-hours of me talking to myself... you don't wanna miss it!
Chris and Reggie's Comix Tawk, Episodes 1-6 (00:00:00) Episode One: Variant Covers (00:43:15) Episode Two: Dreaded Deadline Doom (01:33:49) Episode Three: No Sir, We Don't Like it! (02:48:40) Episode Four: Completionism, Collecting, and Addiction (04:01:07) Episode Five: Decompression (04:50:05) Episode Six: The Four Kinds of Fans
Sharing a compilation of a very special series of episodes. Comix Tawk was Reggie and my Patreon Exclusive program, in which we basically shot the breeze and recorded it. Well, it was a little bit more structured than that... but, it's probably as "pure" Chris and Reggie as you'll find.
Sharing them out here as I don't know if many listeners had the opportunity (or interest) in checking them out before. For this set, we talk about several of the hot-button topics in the comics industry and fandom -- the glut of variant covers, creators treating their deadlines as though they were optional, characters and concepts in comics that we don't really care for, the "myth" of decompression, and a breakdown of the "Four Kinds of Fans" that exist!
Generation X (vol.2) #1-9, 85-87 (July, 2017-April, 2018) (00:00:00) Generation X (vol.2) #1 (00:39:19) Generation X (vol.2) #2 (01:00:10) Generation X (vol.2) #3 (01:25:50) Generation X (vol.2) #4 (01:47:22) Generation X (vol.2) #5 (02:10:46) Generation X (vol.2) #6 (02:33:14) Generation X (vol.2) #7 (03:01:08) Generation X (vol.2) #8 (03:23:53) Generation X (vol.2) #9 (03:47:51) Generation X #85: "Survival of the Fittest, Part 1" (04:17:15) Generation X #86: "Survival of the Fittest, Part 2" (04:42:48) Generation X #87 Writer - Christina Strain Art - Amilcar Pinna, Martin Morazzo, Alberto Jimenez Albuquerque, Eric Koda Inks - Roberto Poggi Colors - Felipe Sobreiro, Jay David Ramos, Chris Sotomayor, Nolan Woodard Letters - VC's Clayton Cowles Edits - Ketchum, Shan, Robinson, Paniccia, Alonso, Cebulski
Collecting the latest (to this point) Sunday Special Series... wherein I checked back in with one of the X-Books that made me go running for the hills back in 2017!
Generation X (vol.2) starts off... well, kinda clunky... kinda cringey... but, it does manage to turn the corner right before the axe of cancellation fell! This is why we can't have nice things...
This is a decently long compilation, collecting a dozen episodes... I hope you enjoy!
Wyler's Presents... (1992) "What's Holding Up the Game?" Yanked from - Green Lantern: Mosaic #1 (June, 1992)
So, this might be the laziest Sequential Ads yet... and, that's saying something!
Whattaya get when your folks are too cheap to buy Kool-Aid? Well, probably Flavor Aid, right? Which, I don't wanna immediately head off on a tangent, but... anyone out there who makes a "Drink the Kool-Aid" reference, needs to actually do some Googling.
I probably don't have to remind you, but... ya'll remember how much sugar we used to put into these? Like, it was to the point where it was tough to stir! And... that was by following the directions! An entire cup of sugar to eight-cups of water. Nowadays, the directions have changed a bit -- Kool-Aid recommends Splenda... which, might offer an even worse aftertaste than the wooden spoon you use to stir the stuff together. Y'all remember tasting the wooden spoon? No? Was that just me? Anyway... Wyler's, on the other hand (which, sorta surprisingly, still exists) recommends sweetening "to taste". No actual measurement... they want NONE of the responsibility for your pending diabetes.
Anyway... let's take a look at today's offering, which, as mentioned -- is a bit on the lazy side, both as an advert and as a Sequential Ads piece!
We open during... uh, the Rapture? Everyone in the crowd of, what I assume to be a high school baseball game, has been whisked asleep... except for the young fella who stole Simon William's 1980's jacket.
He then... breaks the fourth wall (take that, Deadpool!) to address us directly. Ya see, there are ten things holding up the game and putting the crowd to sleep. I'd say it might be fun to go through the baseball boners... but, the answer key is on the bottom of the page. If you're playing along at home, we're doing this on the honor system.
Anyway, in the very next panel, everything has magically been fixed... and our hero is holding what appears to be a glass full of purple gas. It's actually a poorly rendered serving of Wyler's... grape (I assume), and with that - our boy reminds us that Wyler's winning taste can get any game started.
I don't recall Wyler's ever coming into the equation... I thought WE fixed this scenario by pointing out the ten things wrong with the above panel? I didn't drink any purple stuff in the process... did any of you?
Anyway, from here -- we wrap up with the plug panel. Wyler's tag-line has to do with "turning on the world", which... I didn't realize this stuff had any aphrodisiac qualities... but, stranger things have happened.
That reminds me of an odd anecdote from my high school years. I went to high school in the mid-late 1990s, and every day after school my friend and I would make our rounds in the hoppin' town of Sayville, NY. It was the next town over, but, for a time, it was where the nearest comic shop was. So, we'd walk the train tracks from Locust Ave to Railroad Ave in Sayville - hit the shop, then head home toward Oakdale via Montauk Hwy.
Along the way, depending on our cravings, we'd stop at one of two places -- the "Super-Deli" as we called it (because it was a deli with tables and chairs, ya see?), for Fritos and Dr. Pepper... or, the 7-11 for Combos and an Arizona Iced Tea (w/Ginseng).
I'd say I'm not sure why we'd buy these specific Arizona Iced Teas... but, I totally do. They had these really cool-looking blue bottles. I mentioned that this was the mid-late 90s... when so many things were becoming "blue".
So, we bought these things -- they were delicious, and just looked friggin' cool. I mean, tell me they don't! Ya can't.
Now, all was well and good... until we were approached by a group of, I guess nowadays we'd call 'em "bullies", but back then, going by today's definitions, I feel like most people were bullies... it was a different time. Anyway, we were approached... and were told that only [derogatory term] drank this stuff, because it was an aphrodisiac. Naturally, since it was just me and my buddy -- allusions were made, and we ultimately just stopped buying the stuff.
Like I said, it was a different time. I suppose it's a good thing the bullies didn't know about Wyler's having those same qualities, right?
Anyway... that's all I got for today. As of this morning, I'm officially back in the "studio" working on the upcoming X-Lapsed 300 -- which, knock on wood, will premiere on January 31!
Give Someone... a Bad Case of WORMS (1982) From Mattel Yanked from: Justice League of America #208 (November, 1982)
Hey, I thought gross-out humor was more of a 90's thing? I dunno, I look at this -- and, knowing what little I do about "bad cases of worms", makes me itch in places I'd rather not scratch.
Looking at this advert, you might think the product that Mattel is shilling here is simply called "Worms". As, it's the only word that is stylized... bubble-fonted... covered in, ya know... worms. But, in fact, the product's full name is "A Bad Case of Worms".
If you're unaware of the gimmick here, if your parents were to give you A Bad Case of Worms, what you'd be getting is... well, a small plastic briefcase with a pair of sticky worm-like strips of rubber inside it.
Boy, it's amazing to consider just how easy it used to be for us to amuse ourselves, right? Just a couple of sticky bits of rubber and a box.
They were displayed in shops on the usual sort of action-figure peggable packaging, as seen below - and included a certificate you could fill out to... I dunno, legally adopt the little buggers? Legitimize your fandom of non-toxic sticky strips of rubber?
As these were firmly and unashamedly "boy toys", a big emphasis is being placed on how you can use these little critters to gross out all of the important girls in your life. That annoying classmate? Your sister? Your mom? The lunch lady? Nobody's safe from a big ol' infection of WORMS.
In fact, the TV commercial for A Bad Case of Worms is pretty much all about freaking people out. Take a look:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hay3EiNeOV4
Just lookit that thumbnail... ol' Elroy looks dementedly pleased with himself. What he doesn't realize is, he'd likely be grossing the gals out even without the worms.
Now, you might be thinking that scaring li'l sis is the only thing these bits are good for... and, well - you'd mostly be right. But, what would you say if I told you that these Worms can perform tricks? Because, well -- that's the other half of the usefulness of these parasitic Nematodes. By pressing on them, you can make them dance... and if you toss 'em at many of the "slick surfaces" in your home, they'll slither their way down. Oh, what fun!
The Trouble With Trematodes came out just a bit before my time. Well, I was living and breathing on the planet when this Sequential Ad hit... but, I was at an age where I don't think my parents would've entrusted me with stinky sticky rubber. For my generation of gross-boys, we had Wacky Wall Walkers -- which, were basically the same thing, only not shaped like worms. Though, for all I know, there may've been some worms in the mix. I seem to remember spiders.
Actually, after a bit of digging, I just found out I was half-right... or, only mostly wrong. Wacky Wall Walkers were more octopus-ish. Here's a look at an Apple Jacks Commercial which included a (hopefully) non-toxic glow-in-the-dark clump of sticky rubber within.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=syg2kapqem8
And, if you've got an extra half-hour to kill... here's the Wacky Wall Crawler's... Christmas Special? I remember seeing commercials for this... but, I don't think I ever processed that it was actually a thing that exists on our Earth. "Deck the Halls With Wacky Walls"!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xrpxNcu3mes
Back to "A Bad Case..." I mentioned at the start of this already overlong and unfunny piece that, the thing that most jumped out at me was... the name. "A Bad Case of the Worms" conjures up some strange sensations -- nobody, not even a gross boy of ye old 1982, wants to play with parasites... right? I mean, I'm not here to kink-shame or judge, but... ya know, yuck.
I did a little bit of research on the name, and found out that the person responsible is Jill Barad, who would go on to become the wildly successful CEO of Mattel in 1997. She'd state, in a 1990 interview with the Los Angeles Times that "A Bad Case of the Worms" was a bomb. She was handed the product to market very early on in her Mattel career (she'd start at the company in 1981). She said that they "crawled down [the wall] in a very unattractive way." and admits that, "I was responsible for that awful name." Barad claims that the failure of A Bad Case of Worms taught her a lot about "play value" in toys. Which, yeah -- there really wasn't much with the Worms, was there?
With some fake-ass history out of the way, let's take a look at the Sequential Ad itself... using a "found" version of the advert... since mine (above) is a bit muddy.
First things first, we see that the entire city has been overcome with a Bad Case of the Worms... you can see the folks atop the skyscrapers in full-on panic mode. Either that, or they're hyped to watch the Worms travel down the entire length of the building... in their trademark "very unattractive way".
From here, we meet our main character -- who gleefully and proudly informs us that his new toy is "absolutely disgusting". I really don't understand it -- was there a time when boys prided themselves on being gross? Was this a thing... or did the toy companies just try and "make it so"? I honestly don't remember ever wanting to be gross.
From here, he tells us that we can "toss 'em at a smooth wall" and "watch 'em crawl". I'd like to think he's rapping this entire bit. Maybe he's got an equally disgusting friend over in the corner beatboxing along with him.
In our senses-shattering conclusion, our hero uses the bright and colorful neon worms to scare the absolute bejeezus out of his dimwitted sister. That's what she gets for being a girl! Punishment fits the crime, you ask me.
In our post-credits sequence, we find out that these "creepy little devils" are non-toxic... and, if washed with soap and water become just as sticky as ever. I dunno about y'all, but I'm already picturing these things covered in pet hair and dust. I'd guess that, you might get about 45 seconds of play time out of these things. Though, I suppose your mileage may vary.
That's all for today. Were YOU ever afflicted with A Bad Case of Worms? If so, please share your experiences here! I say this with fingers-crossed that this post doesn't find its way onto a fetish sub-reddit!
Marvel Super Hero Portfolios Uncanny X-Men Set Two (1983) By Steve Fastner & Rich Larson S.Q. Productions Cover Price: $7.95
Hey everybody - just a quick share for today.
Yesterday we received the call that our pup's ashes were ready to be picked up... which resulted in a very strange mix of emotions. I'm sure I'm not blowing any minds here, but - this is my first time having to deal with anything like this, so please bear with me.
This was the call I was looking forward to ever since losing him last week -- I felt as though not having him at home was a weird "loose end". I couldn't bear the thought that he was in a drawer... or, wherever. Does that make sense? I dunno.
So, we got the call. And I really wasn't quite as prepared for it as I thought I was. There was a measure of comfort and relief, don't get me wrong. Knowing that we'd be getting him back really set my heart at ease -- but then, that other shoe, as it often does, dropped -- and the finality began to set in.
It's not like I'd deluded myself into thinking that there'd be some sort of miraculous ending to this. Well, I guess maybe I might've deluded myself a little bit. I think that's just human nature... or, whatever passes for it in my addled mind. But this call meant that... I dunno, it was over and done with -- and it truly would be the final word.
Odd aside... the night our boy passed, shortly after he did pass - we brought him to the local emergency animal hospital to set up the handling and presentation of his remains. We were there for the better part of an hour trying to process the entire situation -- while also attempting to make decisions about the next steps.
We ultimately chose a beautiful rosewood box for his remains. We paid, and left... without him.
On the car ride home, my wife's phone rang. It was from a local number. Now, it was around 2am, so we wouldn't normally be getting a call at this time. We immediately realized it had to be the emergency vet -- and, bless us, in those scant few moments - we both convinced ourselves that they were going to tell us that he'd "woken up"... and everything was going to go back to normal.
Now, it was the vet calling... but, of course, no such miracle occurred. The simply wanted to know if we wanted them to hold on to the blanket we had wrapped him up in. But -- for the two or so rings before my wife answered, we were filled with that odd and desperate hope.
And, well -- I don't think that hope, naïve and foolish as it may've been, ever went away... until getting that call yesterday.
I'd mentally prepared myself to receive his little box. I think I cognitively adapted so that, upon sight of it, I'd feel comfort... a feeling of "wholeness", ya know? So, when I did see it - I was largely relieved. We had him back, and - while it was never going to be the same again -- it was a level of "sameness", if that makes any sense at all.
What I wasn't prepared for was... the paw prints.
I knew they were part of the package... but, I don't think I ever registered the fact that I'd actually see them. Like, I knew they were coming... but, never emotionally prepared to see his little footprints. That absolutely kicked my ass. I had to pull the car over for a few minutes in order to compose myself.
Now that he's home again, however, the house once again feels "whole". As "whole" as it can be, given the circumstances. It's not ideal, it's not perfect -- but, it's the best we've got.
--
So, what in all hecks does this have to do with an X-Men Portfolio?
Nothing... I just really wanted to share. Plus, I happened across this bit of ephemera while aimlessly driving around during the aftermath. The wife suggested that I just get my mind off of things for a bit... rather than just clomping around the house like a weeping golem. So, I did.
I stopped at one of the more eclectic shops in the area... a place where I'm almost guaranteed to happen across an oddity or two -- and yesterday was no different. Not only did I find some relatively ancient Comic Shop News's's's... but, I also found this portfolio set -- that I never even knew existed in the first place.
The prints are... well, there alright. I think of the four, the Jean Grey print is the only one I'd consider hanging up -- but, that's not to say that the other three are bad in any way. Just a bit, I dunno... weird? I'm still trying to figure out this WordPress thing... but, I think if you click on the pics, they'll embiggen if you wanna get a better look.
Really not a whole lot more to say... mostly using today's post as a means to get out some pent up emotion, while also sharing some pretty unique X-Ephemera. I apologize if this one was a bit too heavy... and I appreciate you allowing me to indulge a bit.
