Friday, May 8, 2020

Omega the Unknown #1 (1975)


Omega the Unknown #1 (March, 1975)
"Omega the Unknown!"
Writers/Creators - Steve Gerber & Mary Skrenes
Art - Jim Mooney
Letters - John Costanza
Colors - Petra Goldberg
Edits - Marv Wolfman
Cover Price: $0.25

Hey everybody... don't have much of a pre-ramble today.

We're going to be looking at the first issue of Omega the Unknown, which was the book I chose to begin my ReMarvel podcast series with last Fall.  ReMarvel was my attempt at rediscovering some of my favorite Marvel stories... after many years away... and I felt like Omega was a fun place to start that journey.

If you're familiar with my audio-exploits (which I highly doubt anybody is), you'll know that the story that goes along with Omega will be filled with personal anecdotes and tangents.  I "discovered" this book during a very tumultuous time in my life... and, as such, can't help but to equate it with that wibbly-wobbly time.

Here's a link to the show in case anyone's interested (which... yeah, I know... you ain't):



Let's get into it!

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We open with the scene of a man clad in dark blue with red trim and cape is engaged in battle with a small army of robots.  There is an odd, uncertain narration accompanying this scene… it’s unclear who’s voice this is.  The man wrecks havoc on these robots, before ultimately destroying them with a blast from his hands.  Before the blast erupts, we can see that they sort form the “omega” symbol on his palms.


After blasting, he drops to his knees… exhausted.  A previously unseen robot approaches to take advantage of the situation, and winds up shooting our man in the back with a ray-gun of sorts
He screams in agony!


… which segues into our next scene!  A young boy sits up in his bed, also crying out as though he’s in pain.  His parents enter the room to check on him, and address him as James Michael
When asked if he can remember what his dream was about, the boy says he cannot.  He can only remember the “feeling”... cold, desolation… We learn that this family, the Starlings, lives up in the mountains… and to this point, James Michael has never *really* interacted with other children.  He’s met a few, but wasn’t all that impressed.  Tell me about it!


That situation is all about to change, however, because the kid’s going to be shipped into the city to attend school there.  In fact, this scene is occurring at a motel near New York City... and, he’s not taking this change all that well.  I can relate.  The next morning, the Starlings pack up at the motel and head toward their destination.
James Michael still ain’t digging this.  His parents try and psyche him up.


As they’re coming around a bend in the road, James Michael calmly suggests that his mother brace herself… because there’s going to be a collision.  Just then, a truck veers right for them!


It nails them head on, pushing the car off the road… and off the side of a nearby cliff!


Hearing his mother’s voice, James Michael comes to… he follows her voice and discovers her… severed robotic head?!  She warns him not to listen to the voices… as they’re the only thing that can harm him.  Then… the head melts into slag!


As James Michael attempts to make sense out of the situation, whispers begin to arise in the back of his head… those whispers become roars, and he’s suddenly seeing some really psychedelic stuff!  This is interrupted by the arrival of onlookers and passersby to check on the wreck... James Michael begins to panic.


Back to the big guy… our “hero” is shackled to a wall via energy beam restraints.  He looks on as a battle rages between those robots… well, they look like robots… and humans… well, they look like humans.  He is able to break free of his bindings, and launched into action… wrecking the bots.  He steals a rocket and shoots off into orbit.  As he draws further and further away from the planet, he is enveloped in darkness.


Which segues beautifully into the darkened hospital room of James Michael Starling!  He calmly asks a nurse if he was in a coma… she confirms that he was.  He’s at the Barrow Clinic in New York… so, it looks like he made it to the city after all!  He asks why he’s been restrained… she tells him it’s to keep him safe in case he begins thrashing.  He reminds her… calmly, that he’s not currently thrashing, and asks that the restraints be removed.  He also… calmly informs her that if he can’t untense his muscles pretty soon, he might just begin to panic.


The nurse calls in Dr. Thomas Barrow to evaluate the creepily calm boy.  After a brief introduction, the Doc is impressed with JM’s vocabulary.  James Michael tells him he’s been home-schooled.  The Doc asks where “home” is for the boy, to which he calmly replies that he doesn’t have one anymore… because, ya know, mom and dad are dead.  When asked “when?” they died, JM responds with “this morning”.


We learn that he was actually in a coma for a month!  The doc asks how he feels about losing his parents... and he calmly replies “They were good to me.”  He then lets it slip that the only thing he has to fear are the voices... whiiiiich makes the Doc’s ears perk up a bit.
This reaction kind of freaks the boy out… but the Doctor apologizes for overreacting, and everything gets smoothed over.


James Michael asks if he still has to go to school… to which, the nurse laughs… this is the first “normal boy” reaction she’s seen out of him yet.  The nurse gives him a sedative… and he asks her to explain the chemical composition of the pills… ay yai yai.  The Doc lights up his pipe, and tries wrapping his head around everything concerning this boy.  So fascinated is he, that he wants to keep him at the clinic to learn more about his situation.  Unfortunately, James Michael doesn’t have any money… and the Clinic’s board of directors isn’t keen on doing charity… so, the lad’ll likely be on the street before long.


In the meantime, however, he instructs the nurse, Ms. Hart to “pump” the kid for information... and so, over the next few weeks she does just that.  Well, she tries to anyway, this kid ain’t making a peep.


At the next Board of Directors meeting, Dr. Barrows makes his pitch to keep the boy at the clinic.  They tell him to cough up the $500 a week himself if he’s so interested.  Since the Doc ain’t willing to part with the funds, he and Nurse Hart move on to Plan B, which is: Ruth the Nurse and her roommate, Amber will take the boy home with them


While still at the clinic, Amber discovers James Michael playing chess… and they briefly talk about playing games against yourself… some real weird dual-personality chatter here.  Amber says sometimes “the voices” get into her head… to which, the boy perks up not realizing that she isn't referring to anything "specific".
Ruth enters the scene and informs the “punk” that he’s coming home with them.  He’s surprised… but, is cool to go along for the ride… after all, it beats being shipped off to the “funny farm”.


Later, James Michael gets settled in bed… however, before he can fall asleep… one of those robot-looking dudes from the other world busts through his window!  The creature “scans” JM with a sort of eyebeam to confirm he’s the right target... and although he’s not the right size… the bot is fine killing him anyway.


Just then… the “hero” arrives, and engages in battle with the bot!
After a lengthy, and room destroying tussle, the hero lets off an omega blast to destroy the baddie.  He smiles at the boy, collects the bot-body, and leaves!


... Just as Dr. Barrows bursts into the room!  He checks on the boy… who now has smoke rising from his hands.  Upon further investigation, it looks like the boy has the Greek letter “omega” imprinted on his palms…


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What a weird and wonderful first issue!

Now, the first time I laid eyes on Omega the Unknown, it was the Jonathan Lethem/Farel Dalrymple version from 2008...


... which, doesn't really look anything like a Marvel comic, does it?  I was totally taken aback by the weirdness... and, upon picking up the first issue, was completely hooked by the premise... even though, I hadn't the foggiest idea quite what it was!

As I do, I started to research the character... and was pretty surprised to learn that this was a Bronze Age fella... created by Steve Gerber!  I was also kind of surprised (though, I probably shouldn't have been!) by the fact that Gerber was... ticked off that Marvel was "reimagining" one of "his" characters.  He didn't take too kindly to some "outsider" coming into comics and playing with "his" toys... and he made that abundantly clear on a web-site... Omega the Unknown-dot-com, which sadly no longer exists.  All the site said was "Omega the Unknown was created by Steve Gerber and Mary Skrenes".  That was literally it.  Just a black background... and that line of text.  Weird... just like this comic.

I decided to learn all I could about the Gerber "take" on the character... which led me to this original 70's run.  Now, if we were to compare the two takes... which, at present, I'm ill-equipped to do (it's been awhile since I read through either series to completion), I wanna say there were plenty of similarities... but, also... enough differences to make the two feel like their "own thing", ya know?  This '08 Lethem series wasn't like a straight-retelling of Gerber's '75.

Whatever the case... I enjoyed them both.  I almost started a project comparing the two... but, realized that it would have, at best, very limited appeal.  Sometimes I can be self-aware... thank heavens.

Let's go ahead and talk about this issue.

It's... really "in your face", innit?  Very cerebral... and visceral... just really has a way of getting under your skin.  It's a haunting story... that, you'll likely be left thinking about for the rest of the day.  Least that's how I received it (even on subsequent rereads).  It's very dark... and, uncomfortable.

Like, the way James Michael's story begins... we don't get to see him in his "natural habitat".  We meet him at a point of upheaval in his life... in a motel, on the way to a school he doesn't want to go to.  Any semblance of a "real life" is missing.  It leaves the reader kind of nebulously "along for the ride", ya know?  We don't get any touchstone for J.M., which is difficult.  We don't know much of anything about him.  It's a very different way to start a story.

But, it's that discomfort that fuels this book.  We don't get any feelings of "home" or "family".  We're sort of passively receiving all of the information... but, only the information Gerber and Skrenes want us to have.  They're building a mystery... on several fronts.  I don't wanna say that this is "ahead of its time", as I wasn't a living nor breathing human back in 1975, and so I lack the proper context to do so... but, to me... this feels sort of head-and-shoulders above many mainstream comics of the day, insofar as its depth, and I dunno, "headiness".

The scene where James Michael's mother.....'s head tells him to protect himself from "the voices"?  Horrifying, wunnit?  Just from a visual... and visceral standpoint... that's a mind-screwy bit, innit?  J.M. going from watching his mother's head melt away... to full-blown psychedelia... what a visual!  Amazing storytelling from all involved.  Does it make sense?  No... not yet, anyway... but, damned if I don't wanna know what happens next!

Nurse Ruth and her Roomie taking James Michael in... is a bit convenient... and makes me wonder just what sort of paperwork went into (even temporarily) adopting a weird child back in the mid-70's... but, it keeps the story moving forward, so we'll allow it.

Then... there's Omega.  These were always the parts of the story that, comparably speaking, sort of bored me.  It was the sort of "grounding" of this book into the superhero realm... for better or worse.  I mean, for this story to "work", we can't have one without the other... so, we gotta allow it.  I will say, however, that these bits were the least strong... and, I have a sneaking suspicion that might've been by design.

Overall... should you check out Omega the Unknown?  And if so, which version?  I hate being "that guy"... but, my answer is "Yes."  Read it... read 'em both.  As has become the cliche of these Marvel posts... I know neither diddly nor squat about Marvel Unlimited... but, for all I know, this book/these books are up there.  I'll advocate for Omega the Unknown 'til the cows come home!  This one's worth the effort.

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(Not yet the) Letters Page (with a Marvel Value Stamp):


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Bullpen Bulletins & Interesting Ads:


Thursday, May 7, 2020

X-Factor #42 (1989)


X-Factor #42 (July, 1989)
"All that Glitters..."
Writer - Louise Simonson
Pencils - Arthur Adams
Inks - Allen Milgrom
Letters - Joe Rosen
Colors - Tom Vincent
Edits - Bob Harras
Chief - Tom DeFalco
Cover Price: $1.00

Well, we've come this far... why not take a day to finish up Our Alchemical Romance?

--


We open in the Troll Tunnels, and X-Factor is still all chained up.  The baddies reveal their plan that, with the use of Thomas Jones' alchemical powers, they can destroy the British economy... and, ultimately drive everyone out of the country, reclaiming it as their own.  Sounds like an air-tight plan, dunnit?  Anyhoo, the Troll Associates, who are named Phy, Phay, Phee, Phough, and Phumm (not that I can tell 'em apart), work out their plan... two will remain with the prisoners, the other three will start turning things to gold with Thomas.  Worth noting, these Trolls are annoying.  The Trolls that stayed behind spot Baby Cable!  The one called Phumm (I think) shape-shifts into a dinosaur and goes to crush the tot, but the Cablet protects himself with a telekinetic bubble.


Jean starts to stir and knocks some of the baddies over with her TK abilities... after which, X-Factor makes short work of their bindings.  I mean, they're still super-powered mutants, right?  It's not like they've been inhibited or anything.  We get two or so pages of X-Factor bustin' loose.


Meanwhile, we join the rest of the Trolls (and Thomas), as they're reaching the Tower of London via magic carpet.  They want Thomas to turn the White Tower, which is apparently the oldest part of the Tower of London... to gold.  Tower, tower, tower.  I don't think I've ever typed that word as many times as right now.  Anyhoo... Thomas isn't so sure.  Suddenly a dog arrives on the scene, and starts yippin'.  One of the Trolls... slashes the dog's throat?  Oh, c'mon, flag on the play... I didn't wanna see that.  If I rated things on a numerical scale, this scene would've just cost this issue an entire point.


Thomas uses his alchemical powers to transmute the dying and suffering dog into gold.  The Trolls are oddly tickled... and decide, perhaps the Tower of London ain't important enough a place to turn to gold... and so, they set their sights on Buckingham Palace.  Hey, there's a place even I've heard of!  Thing is, he's not to transmute the building... but, the actual Royal Family!


The Palace Guards do their damnedest to hold off the Trolls... but, I mean... they're Trolls.  Do guns even work on them?  (No, they don't).  Suddenly the Police show up, and flash the baddies with their headlights.  This causes the Trolls a fair amount of pain... and does not go unnoticed by young Thomas.


The Trolls go to flee... and it's at this point that X-Factor arrives on the scene.  A fight ensues over the course of several pages, finally ending with the Trolls running back to the tunnels... and not a minute too soon, ya see... the Sun's just about risen.  X-Factor continues their pursuit, and Thomas is able to inform them that the Trolls' weakness is... Sunlight!


And so, another fight breaks out.  Iceman attempts to block off the Trolls' path with a wall of ice... but, it barely slows the bad guys down.  At this point, Thomas actually considers using his newly-minted alchemical powers to... turn the Trolls into gold.  He quickly dismisses this notion, almost equating it to murder... as there's no way he'd ever be able to return them to flesh and bone.


As the chase continues, Thomas calls out to X-Factor, revealing their current location (they're actually very close to his house... just, ya know, underground).  He asks Cyclops to smash a hole in the ceiling of the tunnel to let some sunshine in... and so, ZAPT!  Unfortunately for the good guys... it's just another rainy London day... ain't no Sun in the sky right now!


The Troll Associates are soon reunited in full... so, those two that X-Factor gave the slip earlier on, are back in the picture.  The Trolls decide that... maybe the best way to get this alchemical kid to do their bidding would be to, well... threaten his mum.  And so, they nab her!  If Thomas doesn't turn all the things to gold... they're going to flick her head clean off her shoulders.


Thomas is outta luck.  He's kind of run out of choices here... and so, he mulls it over.  He equates the Trolls to terrorists... who have no qualms about threatening and endangering innocents.  And so, he does what he'd thought about doing earlier this issue... he... turns (two of) the Trolls to gold!  Not sure where the other three got off to, but... I'm glad they're gone regardless.


After this, Thomas vows to the Golden Trolls that he'll become a Molecular Biochemist, and one day return them to flesh and blood.  Well, whatever helps ya sleep at night, Tom.


X-Factor and the Joneses decide to drop the Troll Figures in Hyde Park... but, before leaving, Thomas transmutes the gold into lead... ya know, this way they won't be so enticing to thieves.  Beast offers the kid a spot at their School for Mutants... but, Thomas turns 'em down... he's set on going to University so he might eventually bring the bad guys back to "life".  Ah, what could'a been!


We wrap up with X-Factor heading back to their Ship... and a teaser that there's about to be a kidnaping (with one p?).  The Judgment War is upon us!


--

Well...

I definitely don't have quite the same "soft spot" for this issue as I did for the first half of the story.  Frankly, I feel like we paid a bit too much attention to the darn Trolls here... and, boy... weren't they just a bit on the annoying side?  Eesh.

That said, I suppose I can be a bit more objective about this issue... and the story, than I was yesterday.  What we have here feels like... I don't wanna say "filler", but it's definitely doesn't feel like "must reading", ya know?  Gotta wonder if they already had the upcoming Judgment War plotted out, and wanted to end it in the milestone 50th issue of X-Factor... and, maybe this two-parter was more a "means to an end" than anything that absolutely needed telling.  I mean, it did give us an extra issue of Art Adams... which, might make the whole thing worthwhile... but, I think, as a story, this probably could've been tightened up, and told in one.

Let's talk Thomas.  We see that he realizes that actions have consequences.  He's got this unbelievable power to tinker with the chemical makeup of... anything, living or otherwise!  He knows that, if he were to turn the Trolls to gold... it'd very likely be a one-way trip... and, as such, really has to be pushed to his limit before he does so.  I thought this was pretty cool... and added a bit of nuance to his character, as well as direction for the future.

Though... just a few pages before he begrudgingly turns the Trolls to gold, he does tell X-Factor that sunlight will "destroy" the bad guys... so, maybe he's not really above killing... just as long as he ain't the one actually doing it?  Whattayagonnado?

Overall... as much as I had a hard time remaining objective about the first half of this story... this one, I dunno... kinda felt a bit sloggy.  The Trolls were almost aggressively annoying... and, I'd be fine never seeing them again.  I do wonder if there were some sort of jargon in the fine-print of the Mutant Registration Contest, where "Alchemy" (which he's never referred to as) couldn't become a regular featured character?  I remember something similar went down in the pages of Thunderbolts in the late-90's with the character Charcoal (who was the winner of a contest run for Marvel in Wizard Magazine, if I'm remembering right)... it got pretty sticky, if I recall.  So, maybe Alchemy couldn't (legally?) ever be more than what he was here?  I dunno... I ain't a lawyer, and I'm one'a the few guys on the Internet who won't pretend he is either!

Overall... I think if you read this two-parter in one "go", you'd really enjoy it.  In going through it one-per-day, I feel like the "seams" show a bit more.  So, I don't not recommend this... but, if you do decide to check out the dazzling debut of Alchemy, I'd suggest you hit up both issues at once.  And, uh... did I mention... Art Adams!

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Bonus Book??? (No, not really...)


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Letters Page:


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Interesting Ads:


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Podcast Plugs (you've already stopped scrolling at this point!):

Today I dropped the latest episode of the show named after this site, in which I discuss our recent visit with Leonard the Duck!



Also, this week...

Morituri Mondays, Episode 18!



From Claremont to Claremont: An X-Men Podcast, Episode 2!

Wednesday, May 6, 2020

X-Factor #41 (1989)


X-Factor #41 (June, 1989)
"Golden Boy!"
Writer - Louise Simonson
Pencils - Arthur Adams
Inks - Allen Milgrom
Letters - Joe Rosen
Colors - Tom Vincent
Edits - Bob Harras
Chief - Tom DeFalco
Cover Price: $1.00

Here's a book that holds a very special place in my heart.  It is... my first-ever X-Men back-issue.  The first one I ever plucked out of the back-issue bins... and, boy howdy... did I feel like I was hot-stuff after finding it!

Ya see, not only was this an X-Book back-issue... it also featured, gasp, a first appearance!  This was like 1992, so that sort of thing informed many of our buying habits.  Our good friends at Wizard Magazine really had a hand in this... ya see, if ya flip over to the X's, to check out this issue... you'd see the magical and coveted "one-colon".


Not proud of it... but, also... not ashamed of it.  It's one of those things where you really had to be there to understand.

Anyhoo, X-Factor was kind of the unsung X-Book back then... especially in light of the bombastic launches of X-Force and X-Men (vol.2).  X-Factor kind of flew under the radar in the back-issue market.  Whereas the new "hot" books were climbing in value on an almost daily basis... these mid-run X-Factors sort of stagnated.  Nobody wanted 'em... and so, once I realized that a) X-Factor wasn't a brand new book when I started collecting*, and b) X-Factor wasn't going up in value... I decided this would be the X-Book I collected!

*If you've listened to the first episode of From Claremont to Claremont (which I don't assume most have), I told my "X-Factor Origin Story", which included my revelation that circa X-Cutioner's Song, I noticed that the book was rapidly approaching its 100th issue!  I was shocked... and stunned, when I realized the book had launched with the "original five"!

So... what else makes this issue so special?  Well, it's the first-appearance of bah-gawd Alchemy!  Who the hell is Alchemy?  I'm so glad you asked!  Let's jump back to the X-Books, cover-dated December, 1987.  Marvel was running a contest... a "Mutant Registration" Contest.  Here, take a look (pics from my copy of X-Factor #23):



In addition to promoting the upcoming Fall of the Mutants, we've got us a contest.  A contest that would ultimately be won by a fella named Paul Bestow... the creator of the kid we'll soon know as Alchemy.

Now, you might've noticed that the contest states that your "new mutant" would appear in the pages of... well, New Mutants, but some scheduling conflicts (possibly due to the number of crossovers and events that were brewing among the X-Books) pushed it back to this here issue of X-Factor.  I do believe that both New Mutants and X-Factor were being written by Louise Simonson at this point... so, it's not like this was a "pawned off" story or anything.

Having this as my first X-Back-Issue really inflated the importance of young Alchemy among Marvel Comics lore (it probably helped that he looked a heckuva lot like your humble host back in the long ago)... but, it just wasn't to be.  Oddly, even though he'd only appear a handful of times from then til now, Alchemy proved... uh, important (?) enough to be one of the 198 mutants to retain their powers after the Bendis "No More Mutants" boner!

I'm going to guess they just kept him powered for "cred" and to show the fans that "hey, we know our obscure muties!".  There were a handful of odd "gimmes" in that 198 list.

Anyhoo... with all that pre-ramble out of the way... let's get into it!

--


We open with a Troll emerging from an opening... under a bridge.  I wonder if this fella realizing what a cliche he's being... and how he's setting Trolls back decades in as far as stereotyping goes?  Tsk, tsk.  Whatever the case, we're in London and this bugger smells gold... and, so... he follows his nose to the loot.  What he finds is a young teen named Thomas, who is dutifully working on his Chemistry homework.  As the boy taps his pen, it transmutes into different elements... lead, platinum, and finally... gold!  Tom's mom calls him down to dinner, and it looks like the lad doesn't even realize what he'd just done.


The Troll enters Thomas' bedroom to go check out the pen.  Sinking his teeth into it, he knows this is real-deal.  The Troll decides to hide out in the kid's room... and plans to kidnap him upon his return from dinner.  Ya see, the Troll Associates could really use an influx of gold.


We shift scenes to X-Factor's Ship, and it's a packed house!  We've got X-Factor, we've got the New Mutants, we got the X-Terminators... and, of course we've got li'l baby Cable.  We enter the scene as Cannonball is being put through a techno-organic obstacle course, courtesy of Warlock.


The rest of the kids are looking on... with Boom Boom looking quite dejected.  Ya see, she's got the hot-pants for Sam... but, he's not paying her much mind.  Also, Dani's got some residual flu-like symptoms from a previous adventure.  Tabitha decides to spice-up Sam's training session by... well, tossing a time bomb into the mix.  She's a little idiot... and thankfully, X-Factor is able to (literally) diffuse the situation before it explodes.


Iceman, of all people, heads over to Boom Boom in full-on lecture mode.  Worth noting, this was back when Bobby had to wear that inhibitor belt in order to control his powers.  Sam flies into the scene to kind of stick up for Tabitha... which totally melts her ice cream, if ya know what I'm sayin'.


Warren and Jean are watching all of this go down... and are in the middle of a rather heavy discussion about all the changes they'd all undergone of late.  This is a really good way to drop a bit of exposition... it's done so naturally, you almost don't even notice that we're being "caught up".


Back in London, Thomas returns to his studies... only to be nabbed by, well... the big Troll.  Being the polite beast that he is, our Troll informs Thomas that he's being taken for his alchemical powers.  Our boy, however, doesn't have the faintest idea what he's getting on about.  A struggle ensues, with the Troll eventually overcoming this gangly teen-ager.  Not this Troll's best showing, izzit?  Thomas calls out, and his mother arrives... and proceeds to beat the Troll about the head 'n shoulders with a broom!  Really, dude... is this your first time trolling?  Anyhoo... the Troll eventually gets away... and we can see that the bricks that Thomas was holding onto for dear life are now... solid gold.


Back to Ship.  The Muties are having a barbecue... roasting weenies on... er, Warlock's Phalanxian phalanges?  That's... kinda gross, right?  What's more, ol' Rusty is making the fire to cook 'em with... so, uh... that's a bit nasty too, innit?  Note to self, don't ever attend a mutant bbq.  Rictor gives Boom Boom a soda, which naturally explodes in her face.  I mean, would you ever accept something carbonated and combustible from a dude who's power is shaking things?  Dani's symptoms are getting worse.  Jean tells her they'll get her to a doctor the following day.


Suddenly... Ship has a message!  Young (and totally not unusual) Thomas Jones has been kidnapped by a "giant mutant" in London.  Are X-Factor bad enough dudes to save him?  Do they even want to in the first place?  Well... Cyclops isn't too sure at first.  Ya see, they've got their hands full with the New Mutants and Baby Cable.  The kids interject, and assure Slim that they're more than capable of holding down the fort while the elders are away on mission.  Jean co-signs with the kids, and Scott decides they're London-bound.


Before we know it, X-Factor are at Tom Jones' house... where his mother fills them in on the 'napping.  Oh!  Also worth noting... for whatever reason, Scott decided to bring baby Cable with them!  Well, I guess fighting Trolls might be a little bit safer than leaving the tot with a girl who makes time bombs...


After getting the low-down, and learning that Mama Jones' windowsill had turned to gold... X-Factor heads out on the town to track down the teen.  What they find is... almost a path of golden breadcrumbs left by Thomas.  He alchemitized a whole bunch of stuff during his struggle... finally leading the team into a Red Hot Chili Peppers song.  Under the bridge, X-Factor find a door of... you guessed it, solid gold.  They know they're getting close.


Cyclops pulverizes the wall with an optic blast... and inside, well... there be gold in them thar tunnels.


Also... Trolls.


The next several pages see our heroes battling the trolls... and coming out of it much worse for wear.  They're ultimately beaten, and bound... in golden chains.  You'd figure those would be some easy chains to break free from, right?  Especially if you're the Beast, no?  Anyhoo, it's here that the Trolls introduce X-Factor to Thomas Jones.


Oh... and yeah, it's also here where the team realizes that Baby Cable's gone missing!  Whoops...


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It's hard for me to be subjective about this issue.  I swear, it being my first X-Back Issue, I've read it cover-to-cover dozens... if not hundreds of times.  I just love it.  Even reading it back today... it was like I was 12 years old again.  It's almost enough to kick off some waterworks, and I'm not joking.  These are characters I've missed... so, so much.

Is it perfect?  Of course not.  But, it's "perfect X-Men" to me.  These are the characters I fell in love with back in the long ago.  I've typed and deleted the next several sentences... like a half-dozen times.  I'm just not sure how to put into words how important this silly, throwaway, side-issue of an X-Men side-series is to me.  I suppose it really speaks to the talents of Louise Simonson... she manages to craft a story with action, strong characterization, while dedicating half the book to a Troll kidnapping a kid in London!

I, in no way, feel like we were deprived of X-Factor/New Mutant "maturation" here.  It feels as though (nearly) every character involved gets a little bit of "shine"... and progression in their own specific stories.  This is the "bubbling subplot" approach that absolutely drew me into the X-Books.  What's wrong with Dani?  What's going to happen with Sam and Tabitha?  These are just little bits, added to the greater "whole"... that don't get much panel-time, and yet... you want to follow where they're headed.  Just wonderful stuff.

As for Alchemy?  I like him!  Granted, I'm not being totally subjective... this is an important introduction for me... and also, as mentioned above... this fella looks a lot like I did when I was reading this for the first (hundred) times!  I wanted to see more of this character during the 90's... but, (outside a two-parter in Excalibur which was too expensive for my blood at $1.75 an issue!) it just wasn't to be.  Would've been neat to see him pop up in some more random issues of whatever, to help out.  Would've popped me, anyway!  Oh well.

Anything else?  Ohhhhhh... yeah, this issue features interiors Art friggin' Adams!  What an absolute treat this was.  Could you imagine... like even for a half-second... creating a character for Marvel via a contest... and having Art friggin' Adams draw its first appearance?  I mean, just try and process that!  Goes without saying, this is a very pretty book... and only makes me wish we had more Adams interiors.

Overall... what can I say?  I've gushed a bit about this very special issue... so, I mean, yeah... I recommend it, with the caveat that... without my odd context, you might find this to be a very middling issue... with very pretty art.

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