Hex #1 (September, 1985)
"Once Upon a Time... in the West?!?"
Writer/Editor - Michael Fleisher
Artist - Mark Texeira
Colors - Bob LeRose
Letters - Peter Iro
Logo Design - Ed Hannigan
Cover Price: $0.75
Haven't talked about Hex in ages here! I wanna say that the last time we did was... probably my first sorta-kinda negative "review" on the site!
Since I finally found the last issue of the series that I needed to complete this run yesterday, I decided... ehh, why not give ol' Jonah another look?
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We open with Jonah waking up in a saloon... and he's rather surprised that his old associates are nowhere to be found. Ya see, last he can remember, we was 'bout to slap leather with a damned Owlhoot... which, with my best guess, either means fight, or make love to. Just then, an hombre called El Papagayo bursts through the doors promising to prove that he's the fastest gunfighter north of the Rio Grande. Jonah blasts him in the belly, revealing Papagayo as being... a robot?!
We can see that this entire event is being played on a monitor a few rooms over. Looks like Jonah's being observed... for one reason or another. Hex drops his flimsy piece and leaves the saloon... winding up in very strange surroundings indeed.
Jonah is immediately swarmed by a few armored geeks. He goes to make an escape, but is unsuccessful. After received a few blasts to the back, he is taken before... some guy, in a flying saucer-shaped, uh... office? He introduces himself as Reinhold Borsten and informs Jonah that he is currently in Seattle. Borsten makes it clear that he's a fan of "fighting men" and considers himself a student of the "art of war".
Looks like the Borsten has collected "fighting men" from all throughout time. As his story continues, Jonah begins to... in their words, "overload". He is then sedated and placed in a pod. Not long after, Jonah bursts out of said pod... and discovers that there are dozens of pod people around him.
On his way out of the area, he finds a glass case with weapons from all throughout time... including a pair of sidearms. He kicks in the case and takes 'em. This, unfortunately... but predictably, sets off an alarm.
He is soon descended on by a bunch of geeks. Jonah manages to kayo the first one... then, he places his hat on the feller's head, so the other guards might get confused (for all of a few seconds). Lucky for him, it's enough of a distraction for him to escape to the outside!
Jonah hitches a ride underneath a garbage truck that's taking radioactive waste to be dumped out in the wastelands. When far enough out, he drops off. The garbage men spot him immediately, and attempt to run him down. Hex pulls his piece... and pops'em both in the head!
After flipping the trash-truck, Jonah continues his wasteland tour... immediately coming across a young woman being accosted by a trio of sorta bionic fellas. Hex interjex and rescues her from the baddies.
The young lady introduces herself as Stiletta... and after an awkward motorcycle ride (Jonah's used to horses, duh) the pair arrive at the camp of the Reapers. It looks like something out of Mad Max... which, is almost certainly part of the inspiration.
Before getting his bearings in his new surroundings, Jonah takes part in a... rather strange barbecue. Looks like the Reapers are about to chow down on a gigundus cricket.
While eating, Hex is approached by a fella named Falcon. No sooner does he introduce himself than Stiletta plant a big kiss on Jonah's face. Seems there might be something personal between these two. Meanwhile, that Borsten guy is being brought up to speed on all things Hex... and we learn that they've got someone on the "inside" with the Reapers. Hmm... who's that guy we just met?
Back with the Reavers, Stiletta is telling Jonah about their next mission. Looks like they have to convince another group to share their water supply... which Jonah doesn't quite understand. He's not sure they need to tromp the entire Reaver Army to their neighbors' doorstep to achieve this. Stiletta disagrees... and so, it's time for a wasteland rumble.
During the melee, Jonah and Falcon wind up paired off. They hop on a "hog" with a sidecar and soar off into the acid rain of the wasteland... at which point, Falcon... punches Jonah! Gasp? I mean, c'mon... who didn't see this coming?
Jonah then... beats the holy hell out of Falcon. The acid rain is still pelting down on them, and so, Hex swipes Falcon's special protective outfit... and abandons him!
Falcon... dies!
We wrap up the issue with Hex being attacked by a helicopter! Holy Freaking Hannah, indeed!
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Now, Hex (and western comics) really aren't my thing... but, taking Jonah out of his element makes for some darn fun reading. This feels like something out of an old Twilight Zone... the grizzled gunfighter waking up in a saloon he doesn't recognize, only to be attacked by, of all things, a robotic man. Really well done to open.
The Borsten stuff... ehh, I guess we need a puppet-master baddie to facilitate some conflict, but I think I'd have preferred just having Jonah out exploring his new environment. I get why they didn't go this route though. I think if this were to come out today, they might've had Jonah "play" for a bit before introducing the bad guys... then again, today we'd probably get 6-8 issues of Jonah just traipsing through the wastelands talking to himself.
The Reapers are a fun little group to associate Hex with... these folks have only known war and the wasteland for the past little while. Relatively speaking, Hex is a wide-eyed naive innocent. For instance, not understanding why the "tribes" can't just share water. Gotta say, there is a lot of potential here.
Some great visuals... sure, there's the Mad Max stuff, which doesn't come across all that badly. It's just a very early-80's idea of the post-apocalypse... lotsa bad mohawks and denim vests. Looks like Texeira is having fun with the concept, and at no time does it really feel like "too much". Also, loved the Reapers barbecuing a giant cricket!
The internal conflict with Falcon... well, who didn't see that coming? Especially after learning that Borsten had a "mole" running with the Reapers. Though admittedly, for all I know, Falcon is a red-herring... and his attack on Jonah could just be jealousy over his perceived closeness with Stiletta.
Overall, a pretty fun first issue... though, I gotta say, I don't know how DC Comics thought this concept would be long-lived. Just seems too far out, at a time where everything was about to be getting pulled into "formation" post-Crisis. A series not long for the world, but one I certainly wouldn't tell you to avoid. Worth a look! This issue is unfortunately not available digitally... probably because it doesn't have Batman in it. Shouldn't cost ya more'n a buck in the wild though!
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Hitman #34 (1999)
"Of Thee I Sing"
Writer - Garth Ennis
Pencils - John McCrea
Inks - Garry Leach
Letters - Patricia Prentice
Colors - Carla Feeny
Separations - Heroic Age
Editor - Peter J. Tomasi
For - Archie
Cover Price: $2.50
I've undoubtedly asked this before, but... you ever come across an issue in the wild that you are completely positive that you own... and are shocked when you learn that you don't?
That's kinda where I'm sitting right now. I had planned to cover the next chapter in our "To Catch The Predator" series... and, I was 100% sure I owned the issue we were going to discuss... I've seen it dozens of times, and have always left it behind because I was sure I already had it!
Well, I don't... and that's why we're discussing a random issue of Hitman today!
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We open atop a building in Gotham City where Tommy's all staked out, and reading a copy of Newstime Magazine. Imagine his surprise when, moments later, he realizes he's been joined by the cover fella of that very same edition... Superman!
Superman, polite as ever, asks if it's okay for him to be there... he doesn't want to just loiter on top of his building. Tommy waves it aside like "Are you kidding me? You're Superman!" He even lets fly with a "friggin" which he immediately apologizes for. Superman tells him it's fine to talk however he pleases... so long as there are no women or children present.
Tommy assumes that Superman is in Gotham to hang out with Batman... and he's not entirely off-base. It's just not that there's any mission they're supposed to be on... it's that Superman came to Gotham to talk... because on this night... he failed.
He decides to spill his tale of woe to Tommy... ya see, that night a spacecraft headed from Earth to Mars (using time-saving experimental atomic engines) had some troubles. Lucky for them, Superman happened to be on Monitor Duty at the JLA Watchtower... and so, he hops over to check in.
He learns that, due to intense heat from the atomic engines, their Commander (Kennedy) died trying to reach their lander... and so, Superman immediately hops to getting the job done so their mission can safely continue. He presses the safety shield into the fire of the engines so the astronauts can board the tiny vessel.
Just then, and just before the entire thing goes boom... Superman notices that Commander Kennedy isn't dead (yet), however, there is no time to save him!
Superman's story continues... he came to Gotham to tell Batman about his failure, and received the same procedural "business only" responses from his World's Finest Pal. Tommy lights a cigarette and suggests Superman take a vacation... he's riding himself way too hard.
Superman suggests that there's more to it. It's not just the events of the evening, but what they represent. He uses the look in Commander Kennedy's eyes to, more or less, poke holes in the entire concept of "Superman". When people see Superman, they know they're safe... they know everything is going to be okay. But, as always... Superman can't be everywhere. He goes on to say that people understand that Superman won't be everywhere... but, in their heart of hearts, they know Superman will be there for them. This is really well done.
Then Tommy tries to assuage Superman's guilt by... going on a rant about everything that's wrong with America? I mean, I get some of what hes driving at... but, this kinda feels shoehorned in. Like this page was the catalyst for the entire issue. Superman says... "I've never really thought of it like that before", which I'm going to assume is just him being polite for taking up this odd man's evening with his stories... because nothing Tommy says here is really all that novel.
Tommy then points across the way. Through an opened window we can see Figs Kernahan... a bad dude responsible for a bunch of the rackets in the "Cauldron" neighborhood of Gotham City. He uses Figs being a free man to show Superman not to be so hard on himself, after all, we've all got a long way to go.
Superman thanks Tommy for his time (and ear) and prepares to head off... not before Tommy sheepishly asks for an autograph though!
Superman takes off... and Tommy gets to the real reason he'd been camped out on the roof. He pulls out his sniper rifle (which, you'd figure Superman would've been able to "see")... and takes aim on Figs...
... then, so touched by his evening (and heart-to-heart) with Superman... he takes pause, and ultimately... lowers his gun. Nah, just kidding... he blows Figs' brains out.
We wrap up the issue with Tommy making a call and making plans to grab a bite to eat... and bragging about his chance encounter that night.
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I liked this issue a lot. Never been all that big on Hitman, the concept, character, or series... but, this was a really enjoyable story!
I like the idea of Superman just unloading his burden on a perfect stranger... it makes you wonder just how many times this might have happened "off panel" with just some rando in Metropolis or Central City or something. Because, I mean... it didn't take all the much prompting for Superman to start spillin' his beans.
Since the astronaut story didn't take place in any of Superman's books... it also makes you wonder about the number of missions he goes on "off panel"... what's more, how many of them ended in complete (or partial) failure. This is really well done.
My only misgiving, and if you read the synopsis this won't be any surprise, is that odd bit about America (which wasn't even really anti-American or anything)... which segued into talking about Figs. That just didn't feel organic... it felt to me like, when you're in the shower and you come up with (what you think is) a great talking point, and you spend the next several days trying to twist any conversation you're in in such a way where you can drop your "genius" line.
That's how I feel about Tommy here. The only way this could've felt less organic would have been if he premised with "Can we change the subject for a moment, there's something I've been dying to say...". Superman, ever polite, tells Tommy that he's opened his eyes... which, c'mon, that's gotta be a gag. Nothing Tommy said was new or novel, and it's certainly nothing that hadn't been said to or by Superman.
The art here... really works for Tommy and the city, but McCrea's Superman (outside of the excellent cover) doesn't really work for me. He's too "butt-faced" and looks uncomfortable in his own skin.
The sorta-kinda "twist" at the end, really made the issue though. Tommy just played therapist for the greatest superhero in the universe... then, splatters a bad dude's brains all over the place. Great juxtaposition... made even more darkly funny when you imagine Superman flying off thinking about what a "nice guy" he'd just met. Though, really... Superman should've started the issue by asking, "Hey, what's with the sniper rifle?", right? Ehh, whattayagonnado?
Overall... great little issue here, well worth the read. If you're a Superman fan, this provides a great opportunity to see him in a totally different environment. This issue is available digitally.
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Green Lantern (vol.2) #178 (July, 1984)
"A Bad Case of the D.T.s!"
Writer/Editor - Len Wein
Artist/Letterer - Dave Gibbons
Colorist - Anthony Tollin
Cover Price: $0.75
I thought we'd found our next #VartoxWeek with our pal The Predator. Figured we could go "all in" on this character... and take a look at all of their appearances.
And then I realized that we won't be able to check out some of their earlier post-Crisis appearances... for reasons I won't elaborate on. It's easy enough to Google. There is a bit of (alleged) irony there... which I also won't elaborate on. Again, easy enough to Google if you are so inclined.
Anyhoo, we'll still be taking a look at The Predator... just not those issues. Haven't decided if this will be a dedicated "thing" like #VartoxWeek or #BrightestMay were... we'll just play it by ear for now.
Today though... we're taking a look at the Predator's first appearance!
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We open with Congressman (would-be Congressman? wannabe Congressman? It's one'a those), Jason Bloch meeting with a group of hired "associates"... the Demolition Team! Hoo boy. He's wanting them to destroy Ferris Aircraft... and after a brief introductory scene, Rosie (the Riveter) agrees to do just that.
Elsewhere, Hal Jordan is chasing down a runaway armored car. He makes rather the spectacle on the streets, and manages to nab the would-be robbers with ease (and flair, naturally).
Then back at Ferris Aircraft, he (and we) join Tom Kalamaku and Bruce "Eclipso" Gordon in a hangar where they are working on a solar jet. Hal greets the gang, and we see that Richard Davis is currently in the cockpit... where he intends to stay. Ya see, he isn't keen on Hal coming in and nabbing all of the glory... and, ya know... he might just have a point.
Later, Eclipso gets a phone call from... Steve Holt, maybe? Judging from the pose, it's almost gotta be. Anyhoo, Bruce is taunted by the mystery caller... nearly bullied off the project.
Elsewhere, we check in with a few more Ferris associates, Clay Kendall, April O'Rourke, and Jake Ramirez. After a jog they return to the field to take a look at Kendall's "Psi-Chair"... if you've been following the blog, you already know how this turns out.
In Washington, D.C., Congressman Bloch is handed a copy of the newspaper. In it, he learns that Green Lantern wasn't in the vegetative state he thought he was. Ya see, it looked as though Hal fell into a coma not too long ago... but, that wasn't exactly the case.
Panicked, Bloch makes a phone call... to a certain satellite... of a certain Monitor! Yeah, that Monitor. After sharing his "tale of woe", the Monitor responds with a pretty basic "sucks to be you, pal".
Worse still, Bloch doesn't know the half of it! He's currently being surveilled by some well-dressed men in a windowless van!
Back at Ferris, Hal and Carol flirt a little bit. Suddenly... the ground starts shaking... the Demolition Team has arrived!
Hal rushes into the locker room to change into his emerald duds... however, before he can take it to the D.T.s, he is visited by... one of the Guardians of the Universe. Ya see, there's trouble elsewhere which requires Hal's immediate attention. This dinky Airfield is just going to have to survive their present crisis on their own! Hal begrudgingly agrees... he did give the Guardians his word, after all.
Meanwhile, the Demolition Team are just wrecking stuff left and right. Some of our Ferris-favorites attempt to intervene... but, that goes about as well as you might imagine. Looks like nothing is going to stop this group of geeks.
Then, in space... Hal arrives on Omnicron Ceti IV, a peaceful-looking planet. As he sets down, he can't figure out just why he'd been sent here. Then... he realizes that Omnicron Ceti IV has an unstable radioactive core... and looks to be heading for the same sorta doom as Krypton! Worth noting, we do get a mention about how fellow-Lantern, Tomar-Re was unable to save Krypton from it's splody doom.
Back on Earth, the Ferris staff decides to stand their ground and have a unified front against the Demolition Team... which, while noble... is just a little bit precious, don'tcha think? It's all a moot point, however, as this is when... he arrives! Ladies and Gentlemen, I give to you... The Predator!
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Well, there ya have it... the first appearance of The Predator. I think, had this character "taken off" this would one would be listed in Wizard Magazine as a "first appearance cameo", with the next issue being regarded as the true "first appearance". Get to inflate the values of more issues that way!
What immediately struck me about this one... and this might sound weird, but it's... the title of the story! "A bad case of the D.T.s". If you don't know, "The D.T.s" or Delirium Tremens is a withdrawal symptom when heavy drinkers are trying to kick the alcohol habit. From all accounts, it sounds like a really bad time... as with most withdrawal effects, I suppose. I don't think such a title would be used today. Either way, that just struck me as a bit odd.
Heading into the story... we've got Hal called off planet, just when Carol needs him the most. Since we have read ahead, we already know that this is leading to Hal taking a "break" from the Corps... and this serves as a pretty great set-up for that.
Speaking of Hal being off-planet. I love the throwback to Tomar-Re's attempt to save Krypton. I was always a fan of linking the Green Lantern Corps (tangentially) into Superman's origin story... such a cool way of interlocking their lores... also, because... c'mon, if Krypton was about to pop... the Green Lantern of that sector would probably at least attempt to get involved, right?
The Demolition Team. Ehh. They're one-note and weird... but they get the job done. If I didn't know any better I'd bet that Peter David created them. He didn't, of course... but, c'mon... that feels like a group of PAD baddies, right?
Then we get a cameo from... the Monitor! I always say this, so I apologize for repeating myself... anytime we see the Monitor during the pre-Crisis, I always feel like we're seeing something we shouldn't. It's such an uncomfortable feeling... but, it works.
It's like that weird "kayfabe-line" that is sometimes crossed in professional wrestling. You see something that feels "off script" and real, and you think to yourself "Sure... everything else that happened here was scripted... but that was real." Not sure why, but that's how I feel when I see the Monitor. Not that the Monitor is "real" in the character sense, but as an editorial tool... he most definitely was!
Overall... not a bad little issue. Congressman Bloch's plan is going into motion, we're sowing the seeds of (yet another) Hal quarreling with the Corps, we see the Monitor, and we meet... The Predator. This one ain't lacking for content, I'll tell ya that much! The Wein and Gibbons team... man, I can't call them "underrated" because we all know how great they are... but, I wish they had more time on the book. This issue is available digitally.
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